New post

Just figuring out how this works
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

On a happy note...

I am going to write down everything that I am thankful for and maybe that will get me out of captain negative zone...
-I am thankful for...

-my soon to be husband
-my mom and dad
-my dog
-having a roof over my head
-having a train pass
-having a job
-having a car that runs
-having enough money to pay my bills
-having the ability to put up with stupid people! YEY!

Bridal Dilemma

So, I got really drunk one night and told my aunt that the only reason she is in my wedding is because I was guilted into it. Now, while that may be true, I still want her in my wedding. I said everything at the wrong place, wrong time... But I then ask myself... what is the right time, where is the right place? Her husband can be just as much of an asshole pretty much every time you talk to him.. but I had one freak out moment due to way too much alcohol, and I am not being spoken to by a lot of my family over this. I mean I put out the offer to accept that I made a mistake, I apologized and I am willing to meet in person to try and talk and work it all out. I have put forth all the efforts to try and make it right again, but no response. My aunt's like, "oh im just not ready to talk yet." well then how can we put it all behind us and move on, if you're not willing to talk?! WTF!!! (sarcasm) REALLY? Honestly, I already have people on standby for my wedding party, so if she decides she can't handle reality, then I have back up plans. But am I really that much of an asshole? No I don't think that alcohol should be an excuse for that to have been said, and I agree that it definetly does not make it okay that it was said in the first place, BUT... I was honest, I was clearly up front, and I feel like with this off my chest, I won't feel so.... (whats the word) I wont feel like I have to be fake with anyone anymore. Like I wont have to hide my feelings. For example in the future, if someone asked me a question where they truly ask for an honest opinion, I can give them an honest answer and not just give them a bullshit answer. Before I was fluffing up some of my answers to people because I didn't want to hurt their feelings. As long as I can come up with a plan so that I can word my answer in a nice way but still be 100% truthful, I dont see how that could be damaging to anyone. And if they are offended, at least be willing to say... Im offended and we can then talk it out instead of letting it all get to us inside and then freaking out later.... does any of this make sense?

First blog ever!

Im starting this blog, because I really don't know why. I was on my way home from work, and at work we have to have a "no complaining day" or week or whatever they decide is fitting. Well, anyone who knows me, knows that I am the biggest complainer ever! I thought at first (on my way home), I should start a club for free for people to get together and have complaining sessions. I mean, haven't you ever just needed to vent, and everyone around you is like... "oh, im so happy, i can't be around such negative energy" yada yada yada. and you're like, well if i could just get this off my chest and bitch about it for 20 minutes, i wouldn't be so negative. So that's kinda what led me to this blog stuff because if a whole bunch of so called negative or angry people got together, it might be way worse than expected. At least this would help people vent about shit they need to vent about, and no one is gonna come swinging! LOL Everyone around me tells me that Im too negative and that I need anger management classes... And then others tell me that Im pretty normal and they could never imagine me being negative. So I need feedback to figure out who is right and who is wrong. this will determine if i need therapy or not. hahahaha actually, i am going to consider this my therapy for the time being. so each day, i may be on here bitching about another issue and i would just like honest feedback.